Out of the Darkness and Into the Light
by Kay30265
Summary: Olivia has a disastrous experience and needs someone to help her through it. Alex jumps at the opportunity to be there for the woman she loves.
1. Chapter 1

**Out of the Darkness and Into the Light**

In the depths of darkness a small frail woman emerges from the shadows onto the streets of New York. Her hair in knots and mud on her dress she walks a path of hopelessness. Stumbling through the midnight streets she tries to find solace and forgiveness for past and present sins. She didn't mean for this to happen, didn't mean to let it happen. As pity and shame finally set in she makes her way to the streets end. Her tough exterior shattered and broken, her dignity stolen, she walks until her feet ache from all the weight of the world on her shoulders. She can't take the tired and lonely existence anymore and finally gives way to the exhaustion that she feels. Tired and cold, and all alone she falls to her knees and prays to go home. The heavy rain falls and masks the tears that slowly track her face. With nothing left to give she allows the pain to settle in and the pain seeps in and she closes her tired eyes. Nothing left but the darkness around her. 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Elliot Stabler made his way into the 1-6 precinct. It was a slow mourning and he was already feeling the turmoils of the day. Rushing to the coffee pot in the corner, he glances at his desk. Noticing that his partner wasn't there yet he feels a since of darkness in the air.

"Hey, Elliot where's Liv?" John Munch calls walking through the door, his partner Fin Tutuola hot on his heels.

"I don't know, she wasn't here when I came in"

"That's not like her, she's usually the first to arrive. Maybe she's sick?" Fin speculated. Just then Captain Cragen rushes through the door, a solemn expression coating his features. "What's up Cap? You don't look so good"

Cragen sucked in a deep breath, looking at the concerned faces of his detectives. He sighed heavily and began to recount the events that had him running through the squad room. " They umm… they picked up a woman, in the ally next to Liv's place. They think it's a rape victim." He says shakily, he sighs another deep breath and continues.

"They umm…they think it's…" he stops, he can't even say it. He himself doesn't believe it but the slight possibility is weighing on his heart and lungs. Fighting tears he presses on only to stopped by the sharp in take of breath from Elliot as recognition and fear set in to his face.

"Its Liv isn't it?" he asks more as a statement then anything else, trying with everything he has to fight the rush of tears coming to the surface just at the thought of it being his partner.

Cragen can do nothing but nod his head and wait for the dam to break in his own resolve, while the rest simply look scorned. All is quiet while they sit and contemplate the feelings of contempt and anger. Finally, after many minutes in silence, its broken by the soft click of heels on the floor. ADA Alex Cabot emerges from the hall into the heart of the squad room with a confused expression falling across her face.

"Hey Guys. Where's Liv?"

That one simple question sparks everyone into action. They all start rushing to the door looks of worry and angst amoung their shattered faces. Orders barked and carried through while the ADA stands still trying to think of something, anything that could make the SVU squad rush so fast. Then glancing around as the detectives rush past her she realizes that theres one missing. Olivia is no where in sight and then a wave of realization crosses her features.

'_Oh God, Please don't let it be Liv; I don't I could take it.' _ She thinks as she turns on her heel and races after the retreating detectives.

The ride to the hospital is deafening. No one says a word as they make there way through city traffic, hoping with all there might that it isn't Olivia, that shes just running late and that shes fine. Each knowing that it isn't true but hoping for the best.

"Olivia Benson? Is she here?" Elliot asks as he races through the emergency doors. Staring at the nurse behind the counter he waits for her to check the logs before firing off the many questions racing through his head. 

Looking at the faces of the detectives and ADA she asks "Are you family?" She watches as the each pull a badge from their pockets and holds them up. "Shes my partner." Elliot says edgily. The nurse nods and tells them what she knows.

"Umm…. Yes, Possible rape, beaten pretty badly. She was admitted aroung three this morning. Shes in room 231."

"Thanx" Elliot barely mumbles as he makes his way to the indicated room, the rest following behind him. No one says a thing, all too caught up in the shock of it all to voice the fear and hurt they feel in the pits of their guts.


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter Three_

The collective group of detectives…plus Alex enters the room now known as Olivia's. She's lying in bed with a sullen and distasteful expression. Her mind is reeling from the events that have led her here.

As her friends spill in from the hallway her heart breaks from the looks of pain and anguish on their faces. First Elliot-her partner and best friend –a look of brotherly love and heartache, then Cragen-the father she always wanted-hurt and worried that this might finally break her, and then there's Munch and Finn-her personal body guards and friends-each with a look that gives evidence to the tears they cried, then finally there's Alex-her secret love-with a look of…dare she think it…complete and total love and devotion, pain, and anger for the scumbag who did this.

"Hey." her voice is barely a whisper and she just can't take their stares any longer and shamefully lowers her head suddenly finding her hands much more bearable to look at.

Alex is the first one in motion and reaches her side in almost an instant. Grasping her face in her hand and urging her to look at her. She stares into Livs scared and haunted eyes and chokes out a sob, her voice trembles and shakes "Are you…are you okay?"

Olivia manages a faint and unenthusiastic smile, "NO!" She sobs out finally allowing the tears to fall. Alex settles on the edge of the bed and pulls Olivia to her in a crushing embrace, effectively delivering the comfort needed for her damaged friend. Olivia grasps tightly to the front of Alex's shirt, hanging on as if Alex was her life line and may disappear at any moment. Her sobs echoing through the hospital room and clutching everyone's heart in a vice grip, threatening to pull the aching muscle right out. Alex glances behind her at the still motionless detectives and sees a look of utter disbelief and heartache on each of their faces, one that she's most certain mirrors her own. Each knowing what happened finally broke the indestructible Detective Benson.

Several hours later finds Alex and Olivia in the same position, still holding on to one another. Olivia's tears having dwindled away into soft sniffles and red rimmed eyes. No attempt at speaking was made and they just sat there, trying with everything they have not to break down again. The guys having left earlier left the two of them to compose themselves and promised to return sometime tomorrow. The doctor stopped by and told them that Olivia could be released and dropped off some paperwork to feel out, neither woman acknowledging her presence. They just sat there, neither one daring to move for it may become a reality they couldn't face, a living nightmare way to close to home.

Finally it was Olivia who broke the intense and gut wrenching silence, "Thank you" she utters in the softest of voices, lifting her head from Alex's shoulder.

"You're welcome." She whispers out, her voice hoarse with her own tears. "How're you feeling now?"

"Umm…better. Still not ready to move or think or breathe, I just wanna sit here and pretend what happened didn't happen."

"Okay" Alex replies, "Do you…um… wanna be alone?" she asks hesitantly, hoping with all her heart the answer is "no".

"Umm…no, I just need you to hold me and I'll be fine." Olivia says softly "All I need is you, to make everything all better." She settles back against Alex and closes her eyes allowing the exhaustion she feels and the headache forming to finally take its toll.

Alex listens as her breathing deepens and sleep consumes her. Olivia holds tight to Alex's shirt, feeling the comfort of her arms wrapped securely around her, grounding her to some semblance of security. As her charge sleeps on Alex uses this time to reflect on the night's trials and the feelings running rampant through her mind and body.

'_How am I supposed to help her with this? Can I help her? …I can't believe this is happening, especially not to Liv, my sweet Olivia! I feel broken and … and I don't know how I feel. My heart aches, my minds racing with all kinds of thoughts and images of what might have happened and what shouldn't have happened. I can't focus on any on thing, pictures popping in left and right, each one horrific and terrorizing. Who would do this? Why wasn't she safe? …Why…why couldn't I protect her and what will this do to her in the long run? I'll do everything I can to help her through this. She didn't deserve this and God help the beast that did this!' _with that last thought Alex pulls Olivia tighter and allows herself to drift off, never once letting go of the snoozing party in her arms.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Waking up in the silhouetted room of the hospital is not how she had planned to spend her morning. She was going to get up and go to work. Maybe stop by the bullpen to see Olivia but that's all changed now. The pain in her heart returns as she blinks away the drowsiness from sleep and looks over at the shell of what used to be Olivia Benson. In its place is a meager and frail woman who has just been through hell and back. Alex has to pull all her strength in order to put on a brave face for the woman she loves.

A soft sound from the doorway makes her turn and she sees a very familiar looking man. He has a handsome face with dark hair and deep almond colored eyes. The look he gives the unconscious detective next to her shows his concern and Alex has to fight not to show her confusion. After several seconds of watching him watch Olivia, she finally asks the question that's been nagging at her.

"Where do I know you from? Do you work with Olivia?" She masks her features so not to give away the jealousy she feels at the prospect that this man is Olivia's boyfriend or worse…her husband?

At the sound of her voice Simon startles away from his inspection of his sister and turns to the blonde next to her. "Oh…sorry. I didn't know you were awake." He says apologetically. "I didn't wake you did I?"

"No you didn't" she lies. "Do I know you?" she reiterates.

"No um we've never met, but my sisters told me a lot about you." He smiles softly. She can almost see a hint of mischievousness in his eyes beyond the pain and fear that cover his features.

"Your sister?" Confusion sets in again. "Who's your sister?"

"Oh god sorry. Hi. I'm Simon. Olivia's my sister." He says holding out his hand in introduction.

Taking his hand in hers she gives it a firm shack as best she can from her position, refusing to release the woman in her arms, as recognition sets in and she finally knows why he looks so familiar. 'They have the same eyes. Her father's eyes'. "Alex Cabot. It's very nice to meet you" she says all professional.

"Likewise. Um do you know what happened to her?" he asks hesitantly he doesn't want to be the one to tell her if she doesn't know. It would ache too much to voice it right now anyway.

"Yes. I've been with her all night. I'm sorry I didn't think to call you." The mask slips and sadness feels her voice.

"Its okay, Elliot called me. I left as soon as I could." He looks over the marred and bruised flesh of the once angelic face of his sister and tears leak through the depths of his eyes as he realizes the horror and pain she was forced to endure. "She looks so broken" he chokes on a sob as the reality sets in and the denial he reveled in is replaced with the irrefutable truth that she was violated. He covers his face with his hands and tries to block out the images of the tarnished version of the usually hard-ass detective, who now looks like a small child who's lost their innocence.

The always calm and cool ADA Cabot breaks at the sight of the pain and heartache etched into the face of the man in front of her. She allows her own tears to fall. She allows herself to break, if only for a little while. She cries softly, and buries her swollen and tear trekked face in the hollow of Olivia's neck.

Neither notices the slight movement of the sheets or the fluttering of Olivia's eyes.


End file.
